Feminist International Declares Victory:

Boys and Men Now Need Special Help to Catch Up

Richard Cox, reporting

The Feminist International, a body whose membership is a secret as closely guarded as the memberships of the KGB, Mossad, Bohemian Grove, and the 1965 Nielsen ratings panel; has produced a draft report confirming what many men have contended for years: Legal and bureaucratic changes responding to Feminist lobbying, Affirmative Action programmes, and vestiges of former chivalry, have placed women in Europe and North America in a position of advantage comparable to that of white South Africans in the mid-20th Century.

Girls, the report reports, now dominate university student populations. Women under 40 in large cities average higher earnings per hour or in monthly salary, than men of the same age. Entrants to the professions are mostly young women. Recent psychological research has shown that boys are naturally ill-adapted to current school culture; and that systemic misandry has lowered boys’ and young men’s self-esteem to levels approximating those reported by Clark and Clark among Negro American children in 1947.

Special help for girls, the report concludes, is no longer required in most fields of study. Major changes in school culture and instructional practices are now needed to seve boys as well as girls are served. Boys and men abused by women number somewhere between 70% and 150% as many as girls and women abused by men; and need Houses of Refuge in at least half the amount of Women’s Shelters, while some Women’s Shelter spaces are used by “clients” not in need of protection; so overall Shelter funding, like special tutoring and self-esteem funding, “might need an increase less than it needs a sex-change.”

The report will be published some time in the next fifty years. “We have not set an early publication date,” explained committee chair Carol Anne van Dyke, “because frankly, having 87% daughters among the children of the authors and the supervisory committee, we want our girls to benefit from our legal and policy achievements before we level the playing field.”

It’s

Not

the

facts

purported

above,

(which

are

true

enough)

but

the

notion

that

a

Feminist

International

(if

it

existed)

would

admit

to

such

inconvenient

truths,

that

makes

this

report

….

April
Fool!

 

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